[ greyweed ] -- and the bored shall inherit the earth...

American Idol

I never got to see seasons one to three primarily because my work made it impossible, and also because I rented a teeny-tiny room in Mandaluyong with no TV. So I never saw who Kelly Clarkson, Rueben Studdard and Fantasia competed against. But that's ok.

I saw snippets of the previous season because I had resigned from work and moved back to Angono where my neices watched every episode. What got me hooked was when Constantine left his band and his bandmates where so pissed off with his decision. Personally, I wanted to see if they'd beat the crap off him. I wanted Bo Bice to win for three reasons: 1- he's a rocker, 2- he has this deep sense of theatrics and showmanship that many singers today lack and 3- because I don't like country music which is Carrie Underwood's weapon of choice.

This season, I've watched almost every episode since the auditions. And just like the next Idol junkie, i have my favorites and most hated contestants.



And here are my notes in alphabetical order:

Ace Young looks and sounds like a relic from the boyband era. I don't undertand what the deal is with this guy, but almost everyone from the show is like cumming at his very existence. They keep on raving about his wide-eyed, "emotion-dripping" eyes, and I don't fu--ng get it because he looks like a retard who's lost in his train of thoughts!

Bucky Covington is one of those people who you like the first time you hear him sing, then you disregard because you realize that the people singing after him are way better. Plus he does mostly country song, so that's a downer for me.

I will admit that Chris Daughtry indeed has a very strong voice, his rock influence (as reflected by his song choices) is impressive. My only problem is that he has but one style, and he sticks to it and refuses to do anything else.

Elliot Yamin isdefinitely one of my favorites. His voice is so fu--ng amazing. He looks like a rocker but he's clearly not. There's just something icky about his mouth, like he's got eight more teeth than the normal person, or he's got more gums. Whatever the case may be, there's probably saliva stocked in his cheeks. But still, he's a great singer.

Katharine McPhee,aside from the odd spelling of her first name, I find her very generic. She's like the nondescript girl in your classroom who sits at the back and nobody would notice her absence. And her voice is nothing we've never heard of before.

And then there's Kellie Pickler, a cute blond from North Carolina who keeps on singing country songs. Again, my pet peeve. Also, she looks like a perfect bitch under a veneer of the angelic and adorable virginal face. Think Sharon Stone.

Until now I wonder why Kevin Covais even got to Hollywood. He's got one style which he exploits and it appears like he's gonna lose his breath in mid-song. Sex symbol my ass! Good thing he's out of the competition, whew!

I'm still "mourning" that Lisa Tucker is out. America must not like her that and I can't see why. Her voice is amazing. She even looks like Aaliyah.

Mandisa does not appear to have a surname. Her choice! She's huge in confidence and in physical mass but her talents seems to have no end. Her ass starts from her back and ends in mid-thigh and her armpits are way, way blacker than her chocolate-toned skin, but she keeps on wearing those sleeveless blouses and tight-fitting pants.

Melissa McGhee looks like those teen villains in Nickelodeon. I can see her playing the evil queen bee in another teenybopper crap opposite Lindsay Lohan. She's pretty, but in a sinister, i'll-bitch-slap-you-from-here-to-australia way. In fact when she was voted off, I can imagine her vowing to kills each and every American who didn't vote for her ala-The Bride from Kill Bill.

There seems to be no end to the things Paris Bennett can cry about. When something happens, positive or not, she's ready with her tears. Somebody gets voted off, she cries, she gets a compliment from the judges, she shed a tear. And her crying spree is rivaled only by her annoying bubbly attitude. But since both Lisa and Kevin are out, she's now officially the baby ofthe group so I guess that kinda gives her the right to act like a baby.

Taylor Hicks is on top of my list. He's nothing like anything in the pop-world that you've seen before. He sings in a soulful, jazzy way and he performs like he's having an epileptic seizure. It's practically a variety show when he's onstage.

And by the way:

Gedeon can smile from ear to ear, literally.

Sway, even if he's Pinoy, wasn't thinking logically when he chose to sing "Overjoyed" and so was Bobby Bennett when he did "Copa Cobana". I mean, come on! Seriously, "Copa Cobana???"

Becky O'Donohue has got to be one of the hottest babes I've ever seen, and it will be to my astonishment if she does not become a model or an actress.
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